As a new mom, there is no way you cannot make an error or ten. I know I made plenty of them the first time around – I just hope I can improve my motherly performance for Baby #2. There is just so much that cannot be taught in a book or online. Most of parenting comes from good ol’ trial and error.
When it comes to mistakes that new moms make, I came up with a list of five that I commonly see or hear – or maybe I experienced myself!
1. Believing all the advice you get.
While it can be great to get thoughts and opinions when it comes to parenting issues, you must do what is best for you and the baby. And please, whatever you do, DO NOT believe everything you hear on the internet! Just because it’s published online doesn’t make it WebMD worthy.
Also, most of the advice will be contradictory, and it can be confusing deciding who to listen to. Take in all of the info you receive, and make choices based on your own family.
2. Comparing your baby to averages found online – or worse, to other babies you know.
Oh no! Little Johnny isn’t potty trained and he’s 9 months old! Look at Little Suzie – she just had her first birthday and can’t even write her name yet like Abby can!!! AHHH!
It’s human nature to compare, but it can be damaging for new moms who do it constantly. Your baby is not likely to reach the milestones as fast as your friends’ little ones, but that doesn’t mean there is anything wrong. Averages available on the internet are very loosely intended to help guide you through what to expect as your baby grows – and not necessary WHEN to expect it.
3. Mild panic attacks anytime something happens – even if it’s nothing to sweat about.
With a new baby, everything can seem like an emergency. He spit up, could he have reflux? He’s crying, I absolutely MUST drop what I am doing to console him! New moms, relax! Your baby can pick up on the anxiety you are feeling, and that may only make situations worse. Plus, worrying too much takes the fun out of having a new baby. Try to keep a cool, calm, and collected front, especially when dealing with minor mishaps.
4. Feeling as though you don’t need help – or cannot ask for it.
Many new moms totally burn themselves out because they feel that they need to do EVERYTHING. Once someone, even the baby’s father, takes over, the immediate feeling of guilt overwhelms them. It is important that all moms take care of themselves from time to time. Please stop, mothers! You need time to shower, eat, poop, and sleep – so don’t refuse any assistance offered from your family…and if you need a break, don’t feel back for asking for help either!
5. Losing touch with your spouse.
A new baby will keep Mom busy, for sure, but it’s important you maintain a healthy relationship with your partner once the little one is home. You don’t want to roll over in bed a year after your baby is born and not even recognize the person beside you…that would be totally scary!
Hire a babysitter twice a month if possible. If the budget is tight, have a family member come over and watch the infant – most are happy to do that when the baby is brand new! Even if you can’t get away from home for the evening, plan in-home date nights to enjoy your spouse’s company while Baby is napping.
What mistakes could you add to this list? Please share them in the comments below!