I am not exactly keeping up my resolution to blog more, but until today, I really haven’t had anything to say!

Yesterday was my first day back to school. Things went okay, and I think I’ll like my Thursday classes and professors. We did get to leave an hour and a half early due to the snow that started around noon. I was a bit scared driving home, as that was my first time driving in snow. I made it home fine though, and spent the rest of the night hanging out with James and our friend Austin. He ended up getting snowed in here (more like iced in actually, because a lot of roads between here and his house were ‘inadvisable’ to drive on a few hours after dark.

Weight loss is still going good. I opened a blog to supplement my progress and journey with The Curvy Girls, but I have really slacked on updating it. I just can’t get into having more than one blog anymore. Therefore, I am just going to post a weekly update each Friday regarding my weight loss here. I’m thinking about also posting recipes, tips, and other weight loss/healthy living information. To bring everyone up-to-date on my progress, my official start date for this venture was December 18th. I do my videos on Fridays, and my first video went live on this date. I weighed in at 224lbs. As of today, I am down to 220.2. Not a huge loss during the past 3 weeks, but I’m looking for slow and steady so that I can really change my life and keep the weight off once I reach my goal. Plus, 2lbs were lost during the holidays, so that is an accomplishment all in itself!!

Though I haven’t blogged about it lately, I’ve still been trying to eat right, exercise more, and lose weight. Well, the time has come…the real deal starts tomorrow. I am a vlogger on the YouTube channel, The Curvy Girls, and I will be using it as my progress and accountability checker. The channel is about the journey of 7 ladies (including myself) and their journey to acquire a healthier lifestyle. Progress, recipes, exercise tips, and more will be shared weekly, with one of the “curvy girls” doing a vlog each day of the week. My videos will be posted on Fridays, with my first one going up tomorrow! Feel free to stop by and subscribe to our channel.

Speaking of video blogs…here’s my first one at SouthernGirlRamblings.com!!

Since I’ve been back in school, my weight loss attempt has been put on the sideline. Because of this, I have managed to gain back all the weight I had lost in the past month (which was only 4 lbs, but still!). James and I talked about weight loss, motivation, and willpower tonight, and I realized how much I lack in the last two areas. I know how to eat healthy…I know a lot about calories, carbs, protein, fat, etc…I know about good portion sizes and how often to eat each day. Eating right to lose the weight isn’t the problem. It’s the motivation to follow a healthy eating plan and the willpower to keep at it that’s the problem for me.

James says I do not follow his advice, and that on more than one occasion I’ve told him I don’t want to listen to him when he gives advice. I’m sorry, but I can’t listen to the weight loss advice of someone who is overweight themselves! Granted, he’s not as overweight as I am, but he keeps teetering back and forth on the scales, and hasn’t made it to his goal weight after about 5 years of trying. He’s came within 10 pounds of doing so, but then turned around and gained back up to his highest weight. How do you take the advice of someone like this? I felt bad when he told me that…as it seems he feels I don’t value his opinion/advice, but if he’s not much better off than me, I find it hard to follow his suggestions.

I wish I could find some way to motivate myself into beginning and sticking with a healthier lifestyle. I’m not interested in dieting, as I want something sustainable that will help me take off the weight and keep it off. I’ve failed every time I’ve tried Weight Watchers, and refuse to try any of the popular diets (South Beach, Atkins, etc.) because I’m not to familiar with them, and honestly, I do not want something that will be too restrictive/difficult to follow. I just want to make good decisions on my eating habits, cut out the eating out, and lose weight at a healthy pace. I feel that once I get to losing some weight, I’ll be able to then motivate myself to continue what I am doing right…but this may not happen until the first 10-20 lbs are gone. Until then, how do I keep the motivation strong enough to go on?

I have read several motivational stories online through the years, but when it comes to my next meal, and choosing between what I want to eat and what is good for me, I seem to completely forget what I’ve read or just ignore the thoughts and go for what I want. I think too much for the present. I have this mentality that, “I’ll eat this candy now, and make up for it later.” When “later” comes, I splurge again, telling myself I’ll make up for that later as well. It’s like I’m stuck in a rut that I can never get out of. The sad thing is, I have plenty of “Why’s” pertaining to weight loss, a few being I want to stay healthy (only problem I currently have is my weight), I want to wear smaller, cuter clothes (plus size isn’t always the most fashionable), I want to like going to the beach (I like the vacationing part, but I hate being in a swimsuit in public), and I want to lose before I get pregnant again (in order to lower some of the risks). Here again, when I go to out to eat or choose to eat a food that isn’t healthy, I fail to think about the “Why’s” and instead indulge myself in what I currently want.

Okay, the rant is over. Now that I have it out, I have to figure out a way to change it.